My medical check-up

It was to be our medical examination today, free of cost, courtesy my employer. Why this sudden concern? Is the management gonna draw a plan based on the fittest of the lot? Is our sick leave policy gonna change?But why now, why when all companies are facing the brunt of economic slow-down is the company spending on a thorough medical examination. Didn't they just cut down on our hikes for being hit hard due to recession? Why cant i accept that the company is doing something for its employees? Guess its just me, being cynical about everything.

So as I walked in and was signing up the form, this girl beside me was confused as to what her marital status was. She first checked married and then unmarried, could not help but think that it was my presence which got her all flustered. The examiners made me remove my bag, my jacket, my shoes and then I started to sense something wrong. Why strip for a routine examination? But luckily I was not forced to strip any further, I was made to stand against the wall and they measured my height. As the guy filled in my details I tried to peep and see what my exact height was. Nobody really believes me when I say I am 5'7". The worst of my fears was confirmed.. I was not 5'7", an inch lesser. I was then seated on a chair and a Velcro strapped on my arm and this guy picks a stethoscope and tries to hear something from my hand. He moves the stethoscope a little to this side and then the other side, guess he got it all wrong - wanted to shout and tell him a stethoscope is to be placed on the chest to hear the heart beats (at least that's what i was taught in school) I mean I have seen docs keeping the stethoscope on the back and trying to hear something, but that still makes sense because if u can hear the heart beat from the front then you can from the backside also (I am not a blond.. just in case i sound like one). Anyways after a while he started jotting down something importantly, guess he was updating his medical notes :) In the next table there was this guy with needles all round and some empty vials, a thorough professional that he was he just stuck the needle and pulled out about 20 ml of blood. He seemed very happy, a blood-thirsty hound is what i thought. He then gave me a small plastic container and told me to pee in it. 'In front of all you guys?', I thought. A expert mind reader(and a prof in blood sucking) that he was, he allayed my fears, with a smile he told me to go to the rest room and fill the container. So here I was done with the first part of my examination.
I was still wondering why the company had gone to such lengths....

After a nice breakfast of Pongal, made Kannan style (the tams swear that it is not pongal), I set off for the second round. An ECG followed by an X-Ray is what was to be in the next round. The smart, matronly lady in a spotless white apron/coat called me inside, smiled at me and asked me lie down on the bed. She cast a glance at me and told me to remove my shirt. Was my wildest fantasy gonna come true now? From the umpteen movies that I had seen I knew what was
gonna happen next, i closed my eyes and waited expectantly. I was rudely awakened from the dream as the doc stuck some wet, sticky mushroom like things on my chest and told me to take deep breaths. She saw something on a monitor and asked me if i was tensed, for my heart was beating very fast. Little did she know it was excitement and not tension. Seems she was checking the electrical impulses from my heart (???? Doesn't the heart just pump blood or does it double up as a mini generator... Disclaimer: I am not a blond).
I was to now go and get my X-ray. As i waited for my turn i picked a business daily was reading an article, more to pass the time than with any real interest (though my feigned interest would make any onlooker to think I was doing research). There was a name that caught my attention, Mukta Darera. She had made it to the list of woman entrepreneurs, she was my batch mate. All of 23 and here she was with a company of her own called Ireboot. I paid no attention to anything after that, here was a girl my age who started her own company and here I was rotting away, getting my medical test done. I walked back to my office, checked out MDs site, thought about where my life was heading. After a cup of strong coffee i got back to my work again.
The feeling of being a loser did not last very long, the only thing that kept running through my mind was 'WHY IS THE COMPANY SPENDING ON THIS MED EXAMINATION????'